Opiate recovery means a lot to me. Not only have I been in recovery for over 5 and a half years but my main mission in life is to help as many people as I can. Getting clean is my greatest accomplishment in my life and has molded me into a strong and motivated individual. I mention all of the time how happy I am now. When I was using, I was the most miserable person around. Every word that came out of my mouth was a lie and after awhile I didn't even know what was the truth anymore and could not even recognize the man in the mirror.
When you are using for some time, little things in your life will start to change. You will do everything in your power to keep your problem a secret but after awhile all of those little changes become one huge lifestyle change. Things that you do not even realize mean nothing to you anymore. Every day someone will tell me that after watching my videos they could relate to my discussion about losing their love for music. This is just an example of course but when you are using, the opiate provides you will euphoria and comfort. Music is something that most people rely on for motivation or to make them happy but when using I never listened. In fact, when the radio was on, I preferred talk radio. What is interesting is that I can not even tell you how many people are the same way.
When you have a little bit of clean time and are wondering what direction you want to go with your life, it is great practice to think back to how miserable you were when using. Humans have this extraordinary ability to forget how painful something was from their past. Many people will get through withdrawals and after a little bit of time convince themselves that it really wasn't that bad and maybe they could use once in a while. This is your mind playing tricks on you.
It is important to use your past in addiction to motivate you to achieve things during your recovery. Many people will daydream about things they want to accomplish and what they are capable of doing but it ends with the dream. When you get clean, get up off your couch and make something of yourself. Think about all of that money you blew on drugs. Now you can save it and buy a house or car and spoil your kids. Getting clean is an awesome achievement and something you should be very proud of.